How to Deal with a Difficult Officemate

Confrontation never looks good, especially if it’s in the office with an officemate. Nothing is better than preventing any conflict from arising to begin with, but when it does sprout up, you should be ready. Sometimes the usual misunderstandings are work-related, which is relatively more manageable. The worse kind of conflict you can face if it’s personal by nature. Here are 4 easy conflict-resolution steps you can follow so you know how to deal with a difficult officemate:

Firstly, know who you’re dealing with. The approach to problems with a higher-ranking official in the company is totally different with the approach you can take with a peer or subordinate in a department. After this, make sure you objectively assess the problems you have with him or her. If it’s work-related, you might want to consider approaching the appropriate level of management or human resource official to help you with the situation. Otherwise, try to take matters into your hand first.

Now that you have a general overview into the problem, be ready to talk with him or her outside the office. It’s always best to talk about settling conflicts outside the office first, before you let other people in the office know about it if it does become more difficult to deal with. You can talk with your officemate at a cosy café or anywhere else that both of you can feel relaxed. You don’t want sparks to flare early on in your meeting before talking with each other about settling the issues that you confront.

Next, you should be open about your opinions with your difficult officemate. Along the way into easing up the confrontation into an objective assessment of your relationship with him or her, be willing to make or propose compromises that both of you will observe from thereon. This is important so that your officemate may feel that, despite your misunderstanding, you’d still be willing enough to give him or her importance as your colleague.

When everything has been sorted out, never come off too casual with a joke or sensitive topics that may be related with your conversation. Don’t assume that everything’s going to be fine and dandy right away to the point that you want to laugh about what just happened after settling your issues. Don’t even try to haggle up a deal that you’ll be bringing a prostitute over to his apartment to patch things up. At this point, don’t make things awkward and just leave everything time to heal the remaining wounds. 

How to Work Less and Earn More

I have a friend who always tells me that she’s not happy with her work anymore. What’s more, she hasn’t been (happy) for several months already. At first, I was surprised by this confession. After all, she’s one of those happy-go-lucky friends I had way back in college. Plus, whenever I look through her things or even at her Facebook profile, she seems happy and well-off. I ask her what’s making her unhappy. She said that despite the hefty paycheck that she receives every fifteen days, her work doesn’t encourage her to grow as an individual and as a career woman, and she has workmates who have serious attitude problems.

I think this is a pretty alarming issue. As I continued getting to know some of my previous classmates’ and colleagues’ lives, I find out that most of them work JUST for the money. What’s worse, around 50% of them are actually underpaid (and mostly women); it’s just that they don’t think they’ll get another acceptable job if they quit their job. Hence, there goes the salary again.

According to a recent global survey spearheaded by Accenture, women think that they can move up the corporate ladder only if they put in more hours for work. On the other hand, more men think that they can do so because of their skill or talent. In developing nations, particularly, career advancement is also heavily dependent on long hours (men and women). The result herein is that most people tend to work harder just so they can get that promotion or at least get noticed by their superiors. The real deal is this—there are actually ways to work less and yet earn more. I’ll share them to you.

First, you have to give your talents and skills the value that they deserve. Think deeply, and think about the things that you can do exceptionally well. Creativity is often one of the most overlooked skills in the office but it can help for better problem solving and winner marketing techniques.

After that, get out a little bit and show that you can do instead of trying to work longer doing the same routine. This way, you’ll get noticed and people will start respecting you more. There is something that experts call a “disruptive skill set”. That skill set refers to a unique skill set that you have and others don’t. Getting this knows will set apart an individual value for what you bring to the table.

Moreover, speak up. There are a lot of people who have the right skills, the right talents and even the right words at the right time…only they were too afraid to speak up. If a project  interests you and you have an idea that may reap good results out of it, tip your superior about it and lobby for it. Of course the best way to do this is to prepare a little presentation or proposal; but really, you may just skip the formality and tell you idea in its rawest, yet workable form.

Lastly, be your best publicist. You know what you are capable of. Remind the world what those things are and be proud of them. There’s a thin line between being boastful and simply being proud of what you were able to do. The smoothest way to self promote is to cross-reference to other skilled individuals who helped you achieve it and to simply keep doing what you’re doing (because people will notice it eventually). Of course, the first step is still to get noticed. So go back to tip # 2: get out a little bit. Also, try to network better by  having colleague lunches instead of eating alone in your desk. This way, you build better professional relationships and these can help you rise up the ladder at any given time. Don’t worry, it’s not sly at all. It’s just…work.

Good luck in your work,


Your New PR Girl